**NEW 1/1/18** Chapter 5 – E07

[powerpress]

Chapter 5

When I got back into town, I was not met with a lot of enthusiasm. The whole time I was gone, Lucy had to take care of my son. I forced her to be a parent, and for that, I was grateful.

We ended up just trying to make life work for a while. The problem was, as soon as I got back, gran was back to the same ole same ole, and so, we couldn’t really stay there anymore.  On top of that, as soon as I got back into town, I parked the car at the house, and after 2 days of being home, the repo men came and got the car. Just like that, we were vehicle less again.

Life was getting rough because of living with gran without a vehicle. On a whim, we ended up going to a place that gave us housing assistance. They helped us get a little tiny house.

Even though the house was small, we made it our home. It was just Lucy, my son and I, and for that, I was thankful. We had one room, a kitchen and a bathroom.

At this time, it was tax time and we got a nice little chunk of change. I think it was like $1,800.

We ended up getting the internet and somehow Sprint gave us cell phones. We were also able to get a car, a Honda Accord. We bought the car on a whim because it looked good, but we were told that it would need struts soon, and when we were driving it, it would screech on both front sides. I figured that it wouldn’t be anything to go and get some struts from a junk yard. I was wrong. This is a part that needed to be bought new, and I had found that out after I had purchased the vehicle. I couldn’t afford to put new struts on it and really hated it after a couple of weeks.

After a short period of time, Ralph started coming over to our new home. He had been staying with gran and gran was getting worse with her dementia. Ralph was on the needle at this point in time. In fact, he had had an incident with an 18 year old woman that was accusing him of shooting her up with bleach. He really is a terrible person and this didn’t surprise us at all. I personally know 5 women that Ralph shot up for the first time.

One night, one of Lucy’s friends needed a place to stay because she was fighting with her mom. Her name was Bernice. Bernice and Ralph had fell in love a while ago, and they were terrible for each other. After countless times of these 2 people getting into fights because Ralph would have sex with whoever he wanted, and she was possessive and crazy just like him, they finally realized that they were a train wreck together. They are both bi-polar and everything they did together was all bad.

Her mother and step dad had us meet them at a CVS to get Bernice. When they pulled up, they were acting really nasty towards Bernice, and so I stepped in and started cussing these people out, telling them “what kind of parent puts their child out in the middle of winter” and “you guys are trash”. Things along that line. I can’t stand people that think they are better than anyone else, those that hurt others when others obviously have problems. I told them that her daughter had problems because they had problems and how could they ever expect their daughter to get better at life if they abandoned her at every moment, just as she was getting back on her feet. I hate people like that. Nasty people.

When we invited her over to stay with us, Lucy told her that Ralph was living in the basement of our house, and that if she and Ralph decided to mess around with each other, get intimate in any way, Bernice would not be able to live with us anymore. She said she wouldn’t do anything with him, and agreed to help us in any way that she could.

I ended up giving her one of the cell phones that I had gotten at tax time because we were out of money and she told us that she would help us by paying more than half of the bill. I was stoked about this because we really needed at least one phone.

About a week after Bernice moved in, Lucy and I came home and we couldn’t find her. Lucy opened the basement door, and said out loud “I told you if you started having sex with my brother, you have to go, so, it’s time to go. Get out.” At this, Lucy came back up the stairs and told me that when she walked downstairs, all she could see was her brothers pimply rear end and Bernice’s rear as they were having sex doggy style.

Now, at this point, I decided to do something nice for this woman. I looked at Lucy and said “slow down, I know that she messed up, but we both knew that this was going to happen. Let’s give her one more chance.”

At this, Bernice came up the stairs very sadly. When she emerged from the basement, Lucy said to her “why would you do that? We gave you a place to stay for basically free and all we asked is that you NOT do anything with my brother” Right then, Ralph emerged from the basement and said “Don’t be mad at her. I am the one who talked her into it. Be mad at me.”

I then spoke up and said “I knew this was going to happen. You guys can’t do this here. This ain’t that. But… I told Lucy to give you one more chance. She said she didn’t want to, but I talked her into it. So, do NOT do this again. You guys can’t have a relationship of any sort. It doesn’t work and we don’t need the drama.”

She said okay and that she promised she wouldn’t have sex with Ralph anymore, and Ralph agreed as well.

From that point on, they just hung out together. One day shortly after this event, we ended up selling the Honda and buying a Saturn. It was better on gas and didn’t make that awful screeching sound.

Ralph and Bernice wanted to go to Wal-Mart a few days after we bought the Saturn, and so we let them.      An hour later they both came flying up to the house, ran inside, and Ralph ran down into the basement. We asked what was going on, and Bernice told us that her and Ralph had just gotten caught stealing and that they had to run from the loss prevention people.

We were like “what the heck! Did they see our car?” They both said that they didn’t know, but think that they might have. Ralph said to not worry, that they probably wouldn’t do anything about it.

That same day, a police officer pulled up to our house. He came up to our door and asked if we had just had anything to do with a theft at Wal-Mart. Bernice was sitting in the living room.

Lucy and I told the cop that we had let her brother borrow the car for a little bit, but that he hadn’t told us that anything fishy had happened while he was using it. The cop asked if Ralph was here, but we told him no. That he had dropped of the car and went out with some of his friends.

The officer had a picture of Bernice from the store cameras but it wasn’t very good. He compared the picture to all three of us and then said very matter of factly that we were good, that none of us was the culprit. He said to not let Ralph borrow the car anymore. We said that we wouldn’t and the officer took off.

At this, I ran downstairs and called Ralph an idiot, but that everything was good and that he wasn’t allowed to borrow the car anymore. He just laughed at us and came upstairs.

Over the next couple of weeks, Bernice started becoming a pest. Lucy and I couldn’t have sex like we wanted to, and we couldn’t get Bernice to just leave for any period of time. We would even ask her to leave for a little bit. She would get this real bitter look on her face and would have a nasty attitude. The reason for this was because we wanted to have sex, but she couldn’t have sex with Ralph, and so she was getting very salty.

Finally, one day, out of nowhere, she said that she was going to stay at her mom’s for the weekend. She started packing the few things she had at the house, and Lucy told me that she had a feeling that Bernice was going to cut out and that we ought to get the phone from her before she left. I said okay and then approached Bernice. I asked her if she was coming back and she said “yes”, that she just needed a break from here. I said okay, and that we would see her soon. I told Lucy this and she said “yeah right, she ain’t coming back.” I said “I don’t know, she said she was”. She wasn’t.

A few days went by, and we started blowing up her (our) phone and telling her that we were going to call the police if she didn’t bring our phone back. I even remotely locked her phone through an app, but it didn’t matter. She screwed us. We had to still pay the bill for that phone and so, we just let the phones lapse. I was so pissed. There was nothing we could do, and so, we moved on.

It was that time of the month again, and gran had gotten her pills. She gave Lucy about 75 of them at this time and we started popping them. I wanted to get higher than I had ever gotten off of pills and so, I would sneakily take 2 or 3 every 45 minutes or so. Sometimes 5 at a time. I did this for almost 12 hours straight. Lucy was asleep during the night that I did this. She woke up and half of the pill were gone, but hey, I was higher than I had ever been. It was awesome.

Shortly after this, Ralph decided to have some girl named Patty over to the house. Patty was Lucy’s best friend Celeste’s step mother. He had brought her down to his basement and had shot her up for the first time. They had sex down there and when they finally came upstairs, she looked ragged. She told us that she had to go and off she went.

2 days later, Patty’s husband came over to our house and started beating on our door. He was yelling “where are you at you rapist? You shot my wife up with DOPE and had sex with my wife! I’m about to call the police on this house. All you sick people are going to prison. And you have kids in there? Come out Ralph, I’ll beat you to death with the baseball bat (which he had).”

Ralph was in the basement. I went down there and told him what was going on. He said just ignore him or tell him I’m not here. I decided to talk to this man.

I opened the front door as he was starting to walk away. I told him that Ralph wasn’t here, this wasn’t his house and that he needed to get out of here or we were going to call the cops.

He said “Go ahead! You meth junkies!”

I told him that I didn’t do meth and that this wasn’t a meth house. That we had our son in the house and whatever he was talking about, I had no idea about.

He said that we would pay, and started walking down the road.

A couple of hours later, 2 police officers and CPS showed up at our house. Ralph was in the basement.

The cops told us that they wanted to come into the house and search it, that they had gotten a tip that there was a meth lab in the basement. They asked if Ralph was down there and we told them that he had not been there in a couple of days. They said “can we search” and though we could have said no, CPS was there, and we did not need any of this. So, we let them search.

They went down there, and we just knew that they were about to arrest Ralph. A few minutes later, the cops came back up, with NO Ralph in tow. They said that it looked like no one had stayed down there for a little while now. They said to not have him in the house anymore and that they would be watching for him. We told them that we wouldn’t let him in at all. That we had no idea anything like what they were saying had happened had happened.

CPS decided to stick around and talk to us, to question us. We told the worker that we would cooperate in any way we could, that we were great parents and that we had had all kinds of problems with Ralph, but that we were not bad parents at all, that we were doing the very best as we could to take care of our son.

The worker looked our son over, checked out our home, watched us interact with our son, and just generally paid close attention to things in our home, to see if we really were good parents.

After about an hour, the worker said that he was satisfied with everything and that he would close this case, that nothing more would come from this situation and to keep Ralph away from the home.

We told him that we would and that we too were tired of all the drama that came with Ralph. We thanked him and watched him drive off.

After this, I flew down into the basement and started looking for Ralph. He was hidden up in the dirt under the floorboards of the house. Very well hidden. He had taken all of his dope supplies with him and made it look like he hadn’t been there by hiding most of his stuff up in the dirt with him. It was crazy.

Ralph was ready to leave and never come back at this point. He knew that the police were looking for him now, and so, he packed everything up, waited until late at night, and took off. That was that. We were Ralph free. Well, at least free of him living with us.

We got to have a couple of weeks free from drama finally, to enjoy the home that we had gotten because of our son. It was relaxing.

Ralph had gotten a motel room and had met another woman during this time named Liv.

They were getting along pretty well and we liked Liv. She was a little Mexican woman that stood up to Ralph.

Ralph wanted to start working. He didn’t have an ID, and he needed one bad. He couldn’t get one from the town we lived in because he couldn’t get his birth certificate, but, he said that if he went to Arkansas, he would be able to just run into the BMV there and pick up a new ID because Arkansas is a simple state to get anything done.

He then asked if we could drive him to Arkansas. I was actually okay with this. I needed a vacation and this would help get Ralph on the right track. He said that he would pay for the whole trip and that we would only be gone a couple of days. He wanted to visit his wife and kids and introduce us to some people. He also wanted to get some red phosphorus meth while there, and said that after he got a good big shot of that dope, that he was going to cut down on doing meth. Yeah right Ralph.

Anyway, we ended up getting on the road the next morning. Liv wanted to come with us, and she had a little money to help with the trip. She also had 30 Vicodin 1000’s.

The trip there wasn’t that long. It took us something like 8 hours with all the stops and such. The thing was, is that Ralph had cooked a couple of grams of dope before we left, and he had put the dope filled coffee filters into a 20oz bottle of soda. Once there were in there, the soda became a super awesome mix of meth that, if you only took a sip of it, you would be high for hours. It was incredibly strong, and I know this because, at every instance that I could take a sip out of it, I did.

I had wanted to get high so badly on meth since I had last gotten high on it the year before, and I couldn’t find it, nor could I tell Ralph to let me have some. I had HAD to abstain from it and it sucked. Now though, I had the opportunity to get high and I took it. No one had any idea that I was lit.

We finally got to Arkansas and Ralph was ready to meet his people. First thing though, we went right to the BMV. I told everyone that I was going to sit in the car with my son. Lucy and Liv wanted to go with Ralph, and so they did.

While they were gone, I sipped on the soda and touched my penis. It felt so great to be high again. I was so excited. I hope that they would be a while in the BMV, but they weren’t. Just like Ralph said, he walked in and got his ID without any issue.

After that, we went over to his family’s house. We started meeting his cousins and uncles and aunts. We went by some of his old stomping grounds, and it was cool, but all I really wanted to do was to get higher at this point. I ended up drinking most of the soda, but there was still a significant amount left when Ralph decided to clean out the car after taking a shot of the red phosphorus dope that he had gotten from a cousin of his.

While we were at said cousins, he had thrown the soda bottle on top of the trash can by the edge of the road, and I seen it. At the end of the night, I was lying on the couch with Lucy, waiting for her to fall asleep, until she finally did.

I was coming down badly and needed to get to that bottle. I ended up going outside to get it, but I was so paranoid that someone was going to see me grab it, that for some reason I just stood at the corner of the house for 2-3 hours. Right outside in the open. My body would not go forth and simply grab the bottle.

I ended up going back inside and tried laying down, but I was higher than a kite still. There was no sleep.

In the morning, Ralph was ready to get on the road and get back to our state. He said his goodbyes and we jumped on the road. I let Ralph drive.

Within an hour, Liv and Ralph were arguing. I was sitting right behind Ralph when out of nowhere; Ralph turns to Liv and smacks her right in her mouth. At that moment I wanted to punch Ralph right in the side of the head. Everything in me was saying just knock this dude out. It would have been so simple. Unfortunately, he had chosen to smack her, wisely. If I would have knocked him out, we were going 70mph down the freeway and my son was right next to me in the middle of the back seat. I could not afford to let anyone in that car get hurt.

I decided to not do anything. Lucy and I just stared at each other. She knew what I wanted to do, but I knew that she knew why I didn’t. No words were said at all by us during this time. We bit the bullet and listened to Ralph and Liv continue to argue.

After about 20 minutes, they finally calmed down. It was a very stressful situation.

Also, on the way back, we didn’t really have any money, and so we were trying to figure out what to do. Lucy had an idea to check to see if she could overdraft her debit card and so we pulled into a gas station and she tried. It worked! She was able to pull out $100 from the ATM. At this, I told her to try to get another, but when she tried, that wasn’t happening. Declined. We got some snacks and some gas and Ralph went into the bathroom to do a shot.

During this time, Liv stayed in the car. Lucy and I told her that it was ridiculous what Ralph had just done. I told her that I really wanted to knock him out, but that I had to think about my son. She said that she understood. We told her that as soon as we got back to the house, that she should leave him alone. She said that she planned on it. She then told us that she had 20 Vicodin left and asked if we wanted any. We told her yes, took a couple of them each, and then she told us that Ralph was going to want the rest and that she didn’t want to give them to him. She decided to tell him that she ate them all, so that she could have them when she got back, to get a little money out of them. She ended up hiding them inside of her vagina so that if he got pissed and searched her, he wouldn’t find them. Always a crazy time with Ralph. Another hour later, Ralph finally came out of the bathroom after finally hitting his vein and getting high. He was back to “Normal” again. We hit the road.

I was very tired from the last 2 days of being awake. I decided to let Ralph continue to drive so that I could get some sleep in the back seat. I fell instantly into a deep sleep.

I woke up 3 hours later to us being parked at a sex toy store. I asked Lucy what was going on and she said that Liv and Ralph were in the store..

She said that Ralph had seen this store from the freeway and he wanted to go in and see if he could steal some stuff.

About an hour later, Liv came out. She said that the people in the store were watching them real bad, and that Ralph couldn’t really get anything. She said that he would be out shortly.

Another HOUR AND A HALF passed by before he finally came out. When he jumped into the car, he pulled out a big black dildo that was hollow and had a vibrator that fit in the hollow space. He said that it was the only thing that he could steal. It was hilarious.

We got back on the road.

After about 4 hours, we got stuck in some traffic outside our state. There was construction going on, and so we started crawling along. For some reason the car started overheating. Apparently the fan wasn’t working and when there was no air flowing through the grill of the car, the engine wasn’t getting cooled off.

Every quarter of a mile or so we would have to pull off onto the shoulder.  This pissed so many people off because you could pass on the shoulder and with us in the way, there was no passing. There was rail and a gully off to the left, and so when we were on the shoulder cooling down, we blocked everyone from passing, which was fine by me, because I can’t stand those that can’t wait. Chill out and wait like the rest of us.

We finally made it through traffic though. An hour and a half we were back in town. What a trip.

When we got back into town, we ended up dropping Liv off at her mom’s house. She didn’t want to be around Ralph anymore for the time being. She wasn’t mad at him because she knew how he was, and she even said that she had goaded him into slapping him. That was not an excuse though. She was excusing him and it was ridiculous.

We dropped Ralph off at one of his friends and Lucy, my son and I all went back to the house. It was getting close to spring now, and the weather was warming up.

During this time, my friend Bags started coming around. I really needed to get high in any way shape or form because meth was on my mind terribly and so, I had him bring over blunt after blunt. He was at my house every day from that point on.

One day he decided that he wanted to downgrade his truck and get a cheaper vehicle. He wanted to sell his truck to buy a pound of weed. We thought that we could easily get $1500 for his truck and so we started looking around.

We found this car lot that had low low prices on the windshields. We pulled in and asked about a car that had $500 on it. The guy said it WAS only $500 and so we found someone that would take Bags’ truck for $1300 the next day. He went ahead and sold it and we went back to get that $500 car.

When we got there, the owner was like “it’s NOT $500 total, it’s $500 DOWN.” We were so pissed. Bags didn’t want a payment, and so, at that point, we started the trading game.

His grandfather decided to help him get a car asap. We started flipping things. We bought a very nice 99 Cadillac Seville for $900, but it had a bad head gasket, so we parked it. We then used the rest of the money to buy a 96 Chevy Caprice Wagon for $600, the seller telling us that all we needed to do was change the valve covers, so we did, but it was still smoking badly, so we parked it as well.

Then, we found someone to buy the Caprice for a handgun, so Bags did that. Then we found someone that wanted to trade an 88 Suzuki GS1000 for it. We drove the Seville up to where the motorcycle was and told the guy that the water pump needed to be fixed, that it was overheating. He said that he didn’t care about that, that his wife would be using it for only short trips to the store and such. His motorcycle was awesome. We ended up making the trade.

Bags couldn’t ride a motorcycle though. I could. I told him to jump on the back, and I trailed him (rode him behind me) all the way home. This bike was awesome. It wasn’t stock, it had been modified to drag race. It flew with both of us on it. We couldn’t really go that fast though because I didn’t have any goggles or a mask. I had to keep it below 80mph, though we could have easily gone 140mph with both of us on it.

He was terrified of this bike. He wanted to learn how ride, but this was not a little bike by any means. We decided to take him to a parking lot and let him try.

You could tell he wasn’t ready, but he did it. He had been paying attention to my instruction, and he got it, but he didn’t get it great. After I went home, he told me that he had gone around the block a few times on it, and hadn’t crashed, but he still wasn’t sure of himself, and so he put the bike up to try and sell it. I told him that I wanted to buy it, but I had no money.

I got an idea to call my best friend to ask him if he knew anyone that wanted to buy an awesome bike. He told me immediately that he knew just the person and to bring it up to his city. I told Bags this and he and his grandfather jumped into his grandfather’s car, me on the bike, and off we went.

I opened this bike up while it was just me. 130mph feels amazing on a bike.

We got to my friends friend’s house. When we pulled in, we were given 2 options. A. We could trade for my buddies truck which need leaf springs and basically a brand new bed because the bed was rusted through, or B. We could trade for a 95’ Kawasaki Ninja. This bike was beautiful and I knew, I just knew that we could easily get $2500 out of it. I told Bags that we could actually make money with this bike, and so he told me to take it out and see what it could do. I did, but I only went around the neighborhood. It felt fine, but when I went back to the house, the seller told me that we needed to clean the 4 carburetors because they were gummed up real bad, that we wouldn’t get full power. I told him that we would take care of it. Bags agreed to do the trade, and off we went.

We took the back roads home. Like the GS1000, there was no plate on this bike. I couldn’t really get over 80mph and for some reason, the bike kept dying on the ride back. Then I would have to run a short distance and pop the clutch to get it going. This happened about 3 times before I got onto a straight away where I tried to open it up and sustain it.

I hit 90mph but that was it. I tried to pass a car full of guys quickly, but I ended up just passing them slowly. It was ridiculous. This was a Ninja and it should have torn up pavement.

When I finally let off of it, I started hearing a real bad rattle. We pulled up to my house and let it idle. I knew what I had done. I had blown a valve on this bike.

On top of that, the reason that I couldn’t get this bike to start by pushing the button was that we thought that the starter was going bad. We parked the bike and started researching it.

The next day, I decided to pull the starter off and clean it. I got it off, broken down, cleaned and put back together. Then I connected a battery to it and tested it to see if it would turn. It did and it did like a champion, so I put it back onto the bike and turned it over. It didn’t catch at all. You could hear it just whirring. This was a real problem. The only thing that could be wrong at this point was that the starter clutch was worn down and had no teeth to catch from the starter. This was a serious problem.

The only way to fix it was to break the motor in half and repair it from the center out. A major job that we didn’t have the tools to fix. On top of that, when I emptied the oil, there was so much metal in the oil that I knew we had major internal injuries on the engine. We had just traded an awesome bike for a junk bike. Just like that, we were out all of his money.

Thankfully his grandfather was willing to buy Bags a vehicle, but I wasn’t allowed to be any part of the deal. I was so thankful that he Bags was still able to get another GOOD vehicle. Thus, that was the end of my trading days.

Bags smoked a blunt with me in his new truck and we looked forward.

I really wanted to get some meth. At this point, Lucy was had picked up a job at a nursing home, and so she wasn’t there very often. This was my chance to get on Craigslist and start looking for someone to get high with and to have sex with.

Also, I started asking around people that I knew if they could find any meth, that a buddy of mine was looking for it, and that he would pay well.

Bags said that he could probably get some, and I told him to look into it. I would buy it and sell it to my buddy. He was able to get me some, but at this point in time, Bags wanted to get high too, and so he started doing it. He had terrible prices, so I could only get some from him every so often.

One night, Lucy and I got into an argument and I told her that I was going over to a friend of mines house. Lucy went over to gran’s house and when I thought the coast was all clear, I went back to the house. I didn’t think she was going to come back home for the night, so, I decided to order up a little meth and go back to the house.

At this point, I didn’t know what an Oil Burner was (a meth pipe) and so, I used a straight crack pipe without the brillo in it to smoke my dope. You have to be very careful this way because the dope will run right into your mouth.

When I got my dope, I went into my bathroom and started to masturbate. I had been going for about an hour and was just about to come. I had worked for my orgasm and was really stoked that I got to do this in privacy for the first time in my own home. It was awesome.

Just at the point that I was about to orgasm, I heard a car door outside. Then I heard the front door open, and then the bathroom door opened. There I was on the toilet with my penis in my hand. I was so mad that I just had my awesome orgasm interrupted.

Lucy came in and started screaming at me, calling me a crack head and this and that. She only seen the crack pipe, and didn’t know that there was meth in it. I pulled my pants up and told her that I was sorry, that I just wanted to get high and to go back to gran’s please.

That wasn’t happened. She was pissed off at me for a couple of hours, then she finally came back down to earth. Thankfully she didn’t think it was meth. Crack was one thing, meth was a completely different monster to her.

We made it through it and went on with life. One night a couple of nights later, I wrote Ralphs buddy that used to cook dope with him when I first met this family, the guy that started Ralph on cooking, and asked him if he could get any dope. He said that he could and told me to come on by his house.

I waited for Lucy to fall asleep, then rushed over to the alley where I was told to meet him. He was waiting there and took my $20 bill, handed me my dope, and off to the house I went.

When I got inside, I snuck into the bathroom, put the dope into my crack pipe, started trying to hit it, but nothing was happening. I pulled the fat chunk of dope out of the pipe, licked it, and was crappy. It was salt.

I texted him back and told him “that it was cool. Don’t worry about it. I’m not mad” because I didn’t need any trouble. He knew that I couldn’t tell Lucy about this, so he knew that I wouldn’t make a scene. He got me good. I was salty.

Now, during this time, I was tired of being poor, and I had a really awesome idea to make a website to thwart cyberbullying, and so, I decided to start looking around to build this idea of mine into something tangible.

I found a developer who told me that it would cost me $650 to get the site done exactly as I wanted. I was STOKED! This was the cheapest project that I had designed and I could really make an impact!

I decided to start calling celebrities using contactanycelebrity.com. I ended up talking to some really powerful people during this time, including Steve Wozniak, co-founder of Apple. I have his cell phone number in my phone right now still.

But the problem was, no one wanted to invest. I had to resort to asking my friends and family to come up with this small amount.

I finally did, came up with an awesome marketing avenue, built this site, and pushed it.

A month before this, we had been invited to go on vacation to South Carolina, to a cabin in the mountains.

6 days after I launched this site, we went down there for 5 days. I really wanted to vacation down there, and figured that I would be able to spend most of my time pushing my website. I was excited. We were told that the trip, besides our gas, would be paid for, and so, we really wanted to enjoy ourselves. We asked gran for the money to get down there and she gave it to us.

We took off, got down there, and it sucked. The worst thing possible happened: There was no internet. We were deep in the mountains and so, the site that I had just spent the last month preparing, sat idle while I was away.

The worst thing was that I was receiving so much traffic due to my marketing idea, and I could not do anything at all to make us money from where I was at.

The trip was terrible. Lucy’s family hates me, and nothing was different here. They all thought that I was doing a get rich quick scheme, and so treated me with contempt the whole time. Then on top of that, they made us use our food stamps while we were there to feed everyone. It was a terrible trip, and I had to get back. I asked Lucy if I could take the car and go back early. She had been talking about wanting to stay there for a little longer over the regular time that we had scheduled to be at the cabin. They wanted to extend the time they were there, and I was not about to lose any more time on my website.

She agreed to let me go. Her aunt told her that she would drop Lucy off in a few days.

I packed up my stuff, kissed Lucy and my son goodbye, and jumped on the road.

Of course, because I had a few days of freedom, you know that I immediately went to work trying to find drugs, at the same time as I was working on my website.

I got on Craigslist and found a guy that would buy my crack if I would give him oral. I took the car and met him at a gas station. He had me jump in his car and we drove to an abandoned house that he said he used for this purpose. We parked in the back, he gave me some dope, I put it into my pipe, hit it, held it in and put his penis in my mouth. I exhaled and was instantly high. I took care of him quickly and let him finish in my mouth.

I really liked this guy, and so from that point on, we tried to get together once every couple of weeks. He was fun and he got me very high. Plus, he had a nice penis.

Lucy ended up showing back up a few days later like she planned. At this time though, things were not going good for us. At around this point, everything fell further apart. We ended up getting evicted from the house because not once in 4 months did we pay the rent. It was only $250 a month with everything included, and yet, we couldn’t nor wouldn’t pay the rent. We got high and didn’t care about anything else. Not even our own child’s welfare apparently.

We ended up going back to the trailer, once again. Yayyyy!

Shortly after getting to the trailer, we needed money, and so decided to sell the car to buy another one for cheaper. In fact, it was wild, but we ended up getting $800 for our car, then turning around and buying another Saturn just like ours for $400. It was awesome. This one just didn’t have an exhaust pipe. It was loud, but who cares! $400 in our pocket.

Now, Bags was still coming around.

He had some money on him one day and I wanted to get high. I convinced him to get an 8 ball of crack. I had some money on me too, but I was supposed to use it to go and pull a muffler from the junkyard. We had my son with us.

We ended up sitting in the car at the junkyard smoking all my money up. Then he took my money and went and bought some more dope. After this, he started fronting me dope because he knew that I would pay him back. We didn’t have any more money after it was all said and done, and we ended up running out of gas at a gas station. We were both high.

He had to call his grandfather and have him come up and give us some gas. It was awful. Just like I normally do, I hadn’t called Lucy for hours and so, I had to eventually drive back to her with my tail between my legs.

This time was different though. She told me that I had to go. Like actually meant it. I was terrified. I literally had to beg her to not kick me out. I was high begging. At that point, I made a decision to stop smoking crack. I was honest and told her that I really meant it and that I would never look back. I really meant well, but I wanted one more good run with it before I fully committed to quitting.

At this point, we were getting messed with by gran again. Ralph hadn’t been around and that was great, but gran on her own is bad too. We had to get out of there.

I ended up calling around churches to see if we could get some help and get into a motel or something. Someone from a church ended up calling us back and told us that they had an apartment that we could stay at for a week. It didn’t have any furniture in it, but we could put a blow-up mattress in it. We were stoked.

We ended up getting in there. It was nice, but we knew it was temporary. Lucy had just gotten a new job, and so she was gone during the days. My son and I stayed at this house while she was gone.

The third day we were there, she was gone, and I called the guy that would buy crack for me to give him oral. I told him that I had the house to myself and told him to come over as quick as possible. He did.

My son was sleeping in his pack and play in the kitchen when he got there. I didn’t tell him this.

He brought about $75 dollars worth of crack. I loaded my pipe and had him start giving me oral. Just as I was about to orgasm, I hit my pipe. It was the best orgasm I had ever had. In his mouth. It was the perfect end to my crack days.

We ended up having sex after that and I finished him off in my mouth. I had a great time and I thanked him for coming over. That was that. I was done with crack.

I wasn’t done with drugs though. Bags was able to get some good meth after this. I had gotten a front of $20 worth of it from him, then drove back to that house.

When I got it, I didn’t get high immediately. I waited until Lucy went to bed, then I went into the bathroom and started smoking and masturbating. I was afraid she was going to catch me, and so, I went out to the car, put on some porn, hit my dope, and masturbated for hours. She never woke up and came out to check on me, but at 7am, after being out there all night, the boutique that we lived above opened up and the owner showed up shortly after.

I was very paranoid at this time, and I kept looking around. I was very suspicious sitting in this car with my hand in my pants, porn playing secretly. I was trying to hide everything, but instead I stood out like a sore thumb. I finally just came into my hand because I was a nervous wreck.

I went upstairs and laid down but didn’t fall asleep. Shortly after this Lucy woke up and had to go to work. While she was gone, I sat in the house and masturbated more.

A couple of days later, Bags had a nervous breakdown and needed somebody there to talk to him. I went over to where he was, and while he was crying, I laid my hands on his head and attempted to call God into him, to expel demons from him. I don’t know why I did that. It was weird, but it seemed like the perfect thing to do at the time. I said “get out of him satan! I rebuke you!” For some reason it calmed him down, but it was a very weird moment in my life. I can’t explain to much more about it, because I don’t know why I did it, but needless to say, again, it calmed him.

At this point, we asked the people whose house we were staying in if we could stay one more week, but they instantly said no. I know they said no because of my suspiciousness and the fact that I was having people over while Lucy was at work.

So, we made a split decision. We decided that we would take everything we had and pack up. We were going to drive back down to South Carolina, and see if her cousin (who was awesome) would let us stay with her. She had told us to come down anytime when we were down there for the “hellcation”, and so, we did.

This was the first time that we had left the state TOGETHER with the intent of starting over. Lucy convinced gran to give us some money, about $600, and we got on the road. We knew what we were doing and had a plan. All we had to do was follow through with it, and everything would start fresh. We were going to take this money and put it on a trailer wherever we went, and we were not going to look back. We were going to get her cousin to help us for a few days while we searched and when we found what we were looking for, our lives were going to get that much better, so quick.

We just had to get down to South Carolina. That’s all.

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